The Authenticity Equation; ikigai minus masks

Being the youest you you can be

🌸 ikigai 生き甲斐 is a reason for being, your purpose in life - from the Japanese iki 生き meaning life and gai 甲斐 meaning worth 🌸

Do you ever find yourself masking at work, online, or even with family members?

It's exhausting isn’t it?

I try to not say things behind people's backs I wouldn't say to their face, but of course there are times when self preservation or social decorum means we have to sometimes be at least a little different from our inner thoughts and voice.

Those situations though are the signs and signals I take note of, the things I write down when I’m journaling about the type of life I want to move towards, and as importantly the things I want to have less of in my life.

Peeling off our masks leads us closer to authenticity and the honesty ikigai needs.

What is the distance between the me I am behind closed doors versus the me under a spotlight? 

Our level of authenticity is inversely proportional to the gap between our public and private selves. In other words;

Authenticity = True Self - Public Persona

Not always easy to do of course.

As Brené Brown, renowned researcher on vulnerability puts it;

"Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we're supposed to be and embracing who we are."

As with many of the best lessons in life, it's a journey, not a destination.

We've all been there, nodding along to opinions we don't really agree with just to keep the peace. This can chip away at our authenticity, widening the gap between who we really are and who we present to the world.

The wider this gap, the further we drift from our ikigai. 

How can we find true purpose if we’re pretending to be someone else?

A key reason that many people come to ikigai (though they often mean hatarakigai) is to feel that their work makes a difference to the world. For work to truly make a difference it will come from the authentic you.

So, how do we close this gap? How do we solve for X in our authenticity equation?

1. Self-awareness is your superpower; Start by really getting to know yourself. What makes you tick? What lights you up? What values do you hold dear? This isn't about navel-gazing; it's about building a solid foundation for your authentic self.

2. Audit your masks; Take a good, hard look at the different personas you put on. The work you, the social media you, the family gathering you. How different are they from the real you? The bigger the difference, the more work you've got to do.

3. Practise radical honesty; This doesn't mean being brutally blunt all the time. It means aligning your words and actions with your true thoughts and feelings. Start small. Maybe it's admitting you don't actually like doing shots at the next team night out.

4. Embrace your quirks; That geeky side of you that gets excited about a new Sci-Fi series? The part of you that still loves Minecraft? Don't hide them. These quirks are the seasoning that makes you uniquely you.

5. Seek environments that celebrate authenticity; Surround yourself with people and places that encourage you to be yourself. Life's too short for constant code-switching. Find your people.

Simon Sinek, leadership expert, reminds us that;

“Authenticity is more than speaking. Authenticity is also about doing. Every decision we make says something about who we are.”

It's about walking the talk, consistently and unapologetically.

Authenticity isn't perfect. It's about being perfectly imperfect. It's about showing up as your full self, weirdnesses and all. 

The world doesn't need another shiny, slick and generic version of someone else. It needs the raw, real, one-of-a-kind you.

As you strip away the masks and close the gap between your true self and your public persona, something magical happens. Your ikigai comes into focus.

Yuval Noah Harari, author and historian, notes that "In a world deluged by irrelevant information, clarity is power." And what brings more clarity than being true to yourself?

So, are you ready to solve your own authenticity equation?

I think the result is worth it. Showing up as your authentic self changes the world, one messily beautiful and genuine interaction at a time.

Your journey to authenticity and ikigai begins with self-acceptance. From there, the possibilities are endless.

Sarah, seeking ikigai xxx

PS; What mask are you wearing that you'd like to take off? Share your thoughts in the comments and let's support each other on this journey to authenticity!

PPS; I was inspired by watching Chris Do this morning, I love his teachings on personal branding and I firmly believe that following a path towards ikigai is one of the best ways to unearth that for ourselves;